Today I read a quote by one of my favorite non-dualistic teachers, Rupert Spira: “Have the courage and the clarity to see that God neither cares nor even knows about suffering. Suffering is resistance, and God – eternal, infinite Awareness – like empty space, knows no resistance, and therefore cannot know suffering.” It really made me stop for a moment to contemplate suffering, and it immediately took me back to the moment in time that I saw that God does not know forgiveness.
It occurred in a dream. I had acted out horrible cruelty on another, and in seeing what I had done, was now face to face with this creature, begging and imploring its forgiveness. I was sobbing and repeating my apologies, on my knees. This creature morphed out of physical form and into pure energy, emitting colors that were indescribably exquisite and nothing like I’d seen before. And each I time I begged its forgiveness, it pulsated its energy towards me, and I could see and feel it enveloping me. I experienced this energy as slightly warmer than my body temperature, and it penetrated every cell of my body. The only response to each pleading was a pulsation of this energy. And as the pulsating continued, I began to realize that the energy was unconditional love, and that no matter how much I pleaded its forgiveness, it could not provide it. Unconditional love does not know forgiveness, it is simply love. It could ONLY love me. Unconditional love.
We provide ourselves with our own experiences in life, determined by our interpretations of events, our thoughts and our beliefs, all of which are created by our thoughts. Just as suffering is a resistance we can release, so too is forgiveness something we provide ourselves.
The answers are always within us….