My eyes opened slowly as I came to. It was all over. I was lying face up on the bed and I was quickly overwhelmed by the raging and searing pain in my lower back. The last thing I could remember was lying face down on the table, positioning...
Where did it go?
Where did it go? For years there was this natural pulse of activity in organizing teleconferences and events. I can’t even call it an effort because it felt as natural as breathing, almost like it was my breath. Every day, all day, thoughts appeared that were related to the...
Avoiding the feeling of helplessness
We have not tired of witnessing this phenomenon yet; the tidal pool filling up and emptying out every day. The winding river down the side of our yard is part of this wonder. At low tide it is empty except for the small stream of fresh water that flows down into the...
Chronic Illness and Politics
Our current political climate is giving me a powerful refresher course in the chronic illness experience. It’s been a few years since I was last dealing with the experience of chronic illness. I’ve had a bump in the road here and there, but that week in week out, month...
Contemplating the Election of 2016
Mostly my focus is on emotional healing through the experiences provided by chronic illness. At the chore of it, it’s always about “Who am I?” and this election season is providing significant opportunities for a deeper understanding of who we are. These passed few months, and particularly the passed...
It’s All Energy
This particular Abraham quote is one of my favorites, and yet I have avoided posting it because without a bit of context, it tends to piss people off. I invite you to read it anyway, and then even if you are irritated, read further. It’s definitely worth exploring because...
Be Kind For Lyme
An interview on Emotional and Spiritual Healing Be Kind for Lyme is the do good, feel good movement! They challenge people to random acts of kindness; and to post about it with video/pics/stories. Holly Roesing and Mary Ann Mazzarella are the amazing women who began the #bekindforlyme Movement. Sharing...
Oil, a Ball and some Fishhooks
This might be a strange title for a posting on how to flow with life and not get stuck in the suffering. Let me elaborate. We are often in conversation about allowing ourselves to open to the experience of life as it is, to allow the feelings that correlate...
Stop the Suffering
I might be the only person I know who hasn’t watched Grey’s Anatomy…until now. It was only last week that I began on Season 1, Episode 1…and I’m officially in binge watch mode. After two weeks of putting more mileage on my car than I normally do in four...
A Lesson in Leaving
There were three non-negotiable requirements for the next dog we were to adopt: Both our girls had to fall in love with the same dog It had to be a medium sized dog It had to be a short haired dog And that’s how we ended up with Ben....
An Old Piano and a New Lesson
The girls were in elementary school when they began piano lessons. We purchased an old upright piano through a music school and it found its home in our playroom. The tinkle of simple practice sessions and newly learned musical pieces floated through the house, usually in cramming sessions before...
One step forward, two steps back
Being chronically ill often provides the experience of a step forward into feeling better and then falling back into a rush of symptoms. This occurred multiple times with me as I journeyed forward toward wellness and well being. How we respond to this phenomena can greatly impact our quality...
Doing it her way
It’s been almost a year since my dog, Thandi, was diagnosed with a tumor on her pituitary gland. It’s been a time of focus on feeding her cooked food, supporting her through seizures, and managing a steadily increasing protocol of drugs. She has been teaching me all along. Giving...
Stepping into the unknown
Being physically fit was a constant through my life, even during times when I was heavier than normal or not taking care of myself. Getting to the gym and taking morning runs were totally ingrained into my daily routine. I didn’t care if I felt crappy walking into the...
Going with the flow
“Going with the flow” is an expression we often hear and often tell ourselves we are doing. But is it really something we do? Isn’t it perhaps simply a way of being in which we are receiving life as it is without succumbing to the resistance our thoughts entice?...
A sense of well being during illness
In the midst of what once felt like a fight for my life, the last thing I would have wanted to hear was that I was not allowing a sense a well being, or that complaining about my illness might be disallowing improvement. Actually, I might have been angered...
The broader our wheel base, the less we wobble around corners
When a curve in the road of life topples you over like a little Smart Car taking a sharp turn at 80 mph, brush yourself off and look at how you can broaden your wheel base so that you are more like a Formula 1 racing car that grips...
The Universe: infinite to finite to infinite
A recent participation in a retreat, focused on the nature of awareness, took me out of mind chatter and into a deeper understanding and knowing of the “I” that we are. I floated peacefully through the weeks that followed, in tearful awe at the beauty of what is. And...