Avoiding the feeling of helplessness

We have not tired of witnessing this phenomenon yet; the tidal pool filling up and emptying out every day. The winding river down the side of our yard is part of this wonder. At low tide it is empty except for the small stream of fresh water that flows down into the...

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Chronic Illness and Politics

Our current political climate is giving me a powerful refresher course in the chronic illness experience. It’s been a few years since I was last dealing with the experience of chronic illness. I’ve had a bump in the road here and there, but that week in...

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Contemplating the Election of 2016

Mostly my focus is on emotional healing through the experiences provided by chronic illness. At the chore of it, it’s always about “Who am I?” and this election season is providing significant opportunities for a deeper understanding of who we are....

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It’s All Energy

This particular Abraham quote is one of my favorites, and yet I have avoided posting it because without a bit of context, it tends to piss people off. I invite you to read it anyway, and then even if you are irritated, read further. It’s definitely worth...

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Be Kind For Lyme

An interview on Emotional and Spiritual Healing Be Kind for Lyme is the do good, feel good movement! They challenge people to random acts of kindness; and to post about it with video/pics/stories. Holly Roesing and Mary Ann Mazzarella are the amazing women who began...

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Oil, a Ball and some Fishhooks

This might be a strange title for a posting on how to flow with life and not get stuck in the suffering. Let me elaborate. We are often in conversation about allowing ourselves to open to the experience of life as it is, to allow the feelings that correlate to...

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Stop the Suffering

I might be the only person I know who hasn’t watched Grey’s Anatomy…until now. It was only last week that I began on Season 1, Episode 1…and I’m officially in binge watch mode. After two weeks of putting more mileage on my car than I...

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A Lesson in Leaving

There were three non-negotiable requirements for the next dog we were to adopt: Both our girls had to fall in love with the same dog It had to be a medium sized dog It had to be a short haired dog And that’s how we ended up with Ben. Nicole and Samantha both...

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An Old Piano and a New Lesson

The girls were in elementary school when they began piano lessons. We purchased an old upright piano through a music school and it found its home in our playroom. The tinkle of simple practice sessions and newly learned musical pieces floated through the house,...

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One step forward, two steps back

Being chronically ill often provides the experience of a step forward into feeling better and then falling back into a rush of symptoms. This occurred multiple times with me as I journeyed forward toward wellness and well being. How we respond to this phenomena can...

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Doing it her way

It’s been almost a year since my dog, Thandi, was diagnosed with a tumor on her pituitary gland. It’s been a time of focus on feeding her cooked food, supporting her through seizures, and managing a steadily increasing protocol of drugs. She has been...

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Stepping into the unknown

Being physically fit was a constant through my life, even during times when I was heavier than normal or not taking care of myself. Getting to the gym and taking morning runs were totally ingrained into my daily routine. I didn’t care if I felt crappy walking...

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Going with the flow

“Going with the flow” is an expression we often hear and often tell ourselves we are doing. But is it really something we do? Isn’t it perhaps simply a way of being in which we are receiving life as it is without succumbing to the resistance our...

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A sense of well being during illness

In the midst of what once felt like a fight for my life, the last thing I would have wanted to hear was that I was not allowing a sense a well being, or that complaining about my illness might be disallowing improvement. Actually, I might have been angered or insulted...

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Gratitude

“Everything that is today could not be if it were not for that which was before.” ~ Abraham ….and for that which was before, I am grateful. I sit in profound gratitude for the experience of community and friendship in the Lyme community, and for...

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The Universe: infinite to finite to infinite

A recent participation in a retreat, focused on the nature of awareness, took me out of mind chatter and into a deeper understanding and knowing of the “I” that we are. I floated peacefully through the weeks that followed, in tearful awe at the beauty of...

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On suffering and forgiveness

Today I read a quote by one of my favorite non-dualistic teachers, Rupert Spira: “Have the courage and the clarity to see that God neither cares nor even knows about suffering. Suffering is resistance, and God – eternal, infinite Awareness – like empty space,...

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Meditations on Death

At my sickest, when I was sure that death was imminent, I stopped resisting everything about the experience and surrendered. In that moment I  became fully present to the ‘now’, and I experienced the essence of Self. And in that moment, I felt completely...

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Frozen in illness?

Even though my children are grown up, I have remained a fan of animated movies. I recently went to see Frozen, and as is often the case, I thoroughly enjoyed the humor and then found myself contemplating the underlying message. Spoiler alert: this is the story in a...

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Teens and Lyme Disease

At a glance it would seem so unfortunate that a teenager would be dealt the hand of Lyme disease on top of dealing with the social challenges of being a teen. How unfair, that at a time when going out with friends, experimenting with life and social...

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Never-ending Blue

Who am I? The ultimate question. I remember being 7 years old and contemplating that very question. I went through my entire body looking for that answer. Am I my hands because I can feel things through touch? Am I my eyes because I can see? Am I my ears because I can...

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Finding my Self in a barn

I’ve learned from this beautiful, 120 year old barn. Filled with the accumulated dirt and debris over it’s long and mysterious life, it holds the scents of over a century of history and earthiness.  It has been used in ways I have no knowledge of, and it...

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Dog Therapy

My eyes opened to see two sets of brown eyes peering expectantly at me. This is a daily routine. The dogs wait with great anticipation for their morning walk on the trails.  I hear my mind kick into high gear, as usual, reviewing the list of things I’d like to...

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So much to say about so little

After years of reading many books by wonderful teachers and authors (Chopra, Tolle, Dyer, Gangaji, Hawkins, Katie, Rumi…to name a few), participating in personal development programs, meditating, chanting, personal introspection, listening to talks and seminars,...

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That perfect moment.

After a couple of pretty hectic weeks, last night I hit my stride again, the stride that actually works for me…gentleness. I climbed gratefully into bed, early.  What to read?  What to listen to?  I took my iPad and downloaded a 30 minute audio book by Gangaji,...

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The ‘Doctors’

When it comes to tick-borne illnesses, there is an ongoing stream of complaints about doctors, not just medical doctors, but healthcare providers across the spectrum into ‘alternative’ healthcare providers (OD’s, ND’s, DC’s, etc). There...

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